Tag: Tea

Open Heart, Open Home

On By Mona SabahIn culture, Diversity

Hospitality is a recurring theme in my life, especially growing up in the Middle East and Pakistan. In fact, I could not imagine my life without friends, family and yes, unknown people I have brought home for a hot cup of tea. It was getting so bad at one time that my children would come home and wonder why there wasn’t an unknown car in the driveway… they were so used to having women a my kitchen counter that they had never met. I wrote about it in a post called “HospitaliTEA” and you can read it here.

My life has been enriched by most of these encounters (yes, some of them were downright weird, but then that’s just expected!). My notion of hospitality does not come from having a perfect home (I don’t.), a perfectly appointed kitchen (It’s nice, but not perfect in the least), a perfect family (I won’t even go there), or a perfect life. In fact, I have been known to have dishes in the sink, stuff on the counter, and groceries still in the bag when I’ve had people over… why? Because that’s just life.

So, why all this talk about hospitality?

If you’re a Christian, you don’t have to have a special spiritual gift for it (that’s just an excuse) and you should be doing it – see Acts 2:46 above in the image.

Those who are believers in Christ are downright commanded to show such hospitality (see 1 Timothy 3:2; Titus 1:7-8; Romans 12:13; Hebrews 11:13). One of my favorite passages in the Bible is when Abraham welcomes strangers to rest after their long journey (Genesis 18:2-8). In Deuteronomy, the act of sharing food (Deuteronomy 14:28-29) to help others is emphasized as a blessing. The early church made it a habit to gather together to break bread as a new family in Christ and praise God (Acts 2:42-47). A beautiful gift of hospitality was given to Jesus Christ by Zacchaeus out of the the joy he had in meeting Christ and salvation came to his house that day (Luke 19:5-6)! What a gift he received in turn from our Lord and Savior!

We miss out on blessings to give and receive when we cordon off a part of our lives to others. The early Christians wanted to be a part of one another’s life because many had their own families disown them. This was my own experience when I left Islam and became a Christian. If others had not invited me into their homes, what family would I have had?

I praise God that He invites us to His table to partake his daily bread – why are we so stingy and miserly in the way we invite others? What grace you have been given in Christ? It’s time to go out there and share the love of Jesus, the Gospel through invitation and watch salvation come to someone’s house!

Importance of Fellowship

On By Mona SabahIn culture, Family, Jesus Christ, Muslim, Uncategorized8 Comments

Sarah-tea

Last week, I got to host the 5th & 6th grade girls Bible Study group for an Afternoon Tea at our home. Several of the mothers were not quite sure of what was going to happen at this gathering. When I mentioned that I was serving hot tea out of my china cups, I was met with skepticism and rightly so! Eleven & twelve year old girls handling china with bubbling hot liquids… was I sure about that?

The verse for the day was Hebrews 13:2, which my daughter had chosen a few months ago for the tea party fellowship.

Hebrews 13:2~ Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.

It is difficult to fully understand what that verse is talking about unless you know that it refers to Abraham in Genesis! So, we had to read the following passage:

Genesis 18 ~   1Now the LORD appeared to him by the oaks of Mamre, while he was sitting at the tent door in the heat of the day. 2When he lifted up his eyes and looked, behold, three men were standing opposite him; and when he saw them, he ran from the tent door to meet them and bowed himself to the earth, 3and said, “My Lord, if now I have found favor in Your sight, please do not pass Your servant by. 4“Please let a little water be brought and wash your feet, and rest yourselves under the tree; 5and I will bring a piece of bread, that you may refresh yourselves; after that you may go on, since you have visited your servant.” And they said, “So do, as you have said.” 6So Abraham hurried into the tent to Sarah, and said, “Quickly, prepare three measures of fine flour, knead it and make bread cakes.” 7Abraham also ran to the herd, and took a tender and choice calf and gave it to the servant, and he hurried to prepare it. 8He took curds and milk and the calf which he had prepared, and placed it before them; and he was standing by them under the tree as they ate.

*****

Abraham was visited by the LORD Himself. Many say that the other two men were a part of the Trinity, while others say it was the LORD & 2 angels. Whatever the case, God came to Abraham. He comes, He cares, He is aware, He dines with us (Revelation 3:20) and He is involved in our hospitality to others.

 

The point of the gathering was to share a lesson on hospitality. If we treated everyone who came to our home as if they were sent by God, I think things might look a bit differently in our society. Hospitality is a hot button for me. I come from an Eastern culture that looks on Hospitality as a non-negotiable. It’s what you do – you prepare food for people and welcome them into your home. I wrote more about it here. Upon hearing about the tea party fellowship, one woman remarked that it must be easy for me, since I  was taught by my mother to do that and she’s never had that in her family… my answer to that is so what? Why is that an excuse? If you have a home, you should open it to others.  You don’t even have to cook – simply order food in, have a potluck, use your kitchen, gather together and rejoice!

As a new believer, I read Acts 2:46 which mentions that the newly formed Church met, broke bread together in their homes and ate with gladness. Why don’t we do that more often? My personal experience has been that for every TEN invitations I give, I am lucky to get ONE back. People don’t entertain, they don’t invite and they don’t meet in their homes. Now, we have had invitations to meet at restaurants… but rarely in homes.

My lesson for the girls was not just on how to drink tea from lovely cups… it went further than that. It was to cherish fellowship with one another. To eat and enjoy food together, giving praise to God the Father for ALL He has given you- including a Christian family.

May we remember to invite one another to our homes, may we share Christ in the breaking of bread together, may we pray for one another, may we grow up another generation of young believers who will open their homes and look more like the early church. Amen.

 

HospitaliTEA – Why Southern Hospitality is a Thing of the Past

On By Mona SabahIn cultural diversity, culture, Family, Jesus Christ, Uncategorized11 Comments

image

Some of my earliest memories are of celebrating Eid in Saudi Arabia. We would put on our best clothes, grab sweets and small presents and go from house to house, celebrating with friends. The same traditions continued when I moved to Pakistan and to the United Arab Emirates. People were always coming and going from our home. It was a very warm and welcoming place. My mother, an impeccable hostess, always had hot tea, delicious snacks and beautiful china ready to go in case someone happened to drop by.

When we moved to the United States, however, these visits were far less frequent. Many Pakistanis came to our home from our community, but we really did not receive invitations to dine at American people’s homes. This sentiment is echoed by others who are foreigners or even are people of other ethnicity who live here.

When I bring it up to people, many look at me wistfully and then tell me that stopping by a friend’s home for a cup of tea went away in the 1950’s. It is old-fashioned and just not done anymore – kind of like writing in cursive or sending a letter with a stamp on it.

Those who know me, know that I have a love of all things old. I love Victorian England and all the things that go with it. I like the fussiness of proper manners, correct grammar, and the idea of long dresses with rows of buttons. I like the slower pace of life and even the old European tradition of calling cards and paying calls on friends. If I mention this out in public today, people tell me to go to Wal Mart to get a calling card (as if I am getting ready to call international long distance) or paying calls (no one even knows what it means to pay a call, other than your phone bill at the end of the month).

At my family’s home, there is a long-standing tradition of tea time at 4:00 pm. I have mentioned this in my post about the concept of time in other cultures. This is something I have held onto all my life. Even today, my friends know that around 4:00 pm, there I will be sitting at my kitchen table, drinking a cup of tea. I also know that around the same time daily, I can find my parents doing the same thing across the United States. It’s a tradition and it is so soothing – like a cool oasis in the middle of the desert.

Even when I worked full time, I would stop what I was doing and make a quick cup of tea at 4:00 pm. My co-workers began to join me  in this tradition because nearly everyone experiences a mid-day slump around that time. It makes the rest of the day go by exceedingly fast.

A cup of hot tea has a wonderful soothing property to it. There is nothing like making a little pause in the middle of one’s day to STOP everything and just take a small breather to drink tea. It is a refined tradition and one I love to pass on to my friends. I have had the chance to make real friendships, make a connection and share my home with many. Some of these people I have known for a long time. Others may be people I have just met once or twice.

People are generally surprised at the offer of coming over to my home for a spot of tea. I am met usually with a smile of surprise. It is much more common to get together at Starbucks or somewhere else. Hospitality, along with a cup of tea has also gone by the wayside. When I ask women why that is the case, many tell me that they feel pressure to have their home “just right.” With three children, I find myself wondering when that day might come! I don’t think we have had our home looking “just right” since the day we moved in. If I waited around for that very day, I shudder to think of all the beautiful conversations, the tears of sorrow, the new friendships and renewing of old friends I would have missed out on.

In the Bible, there is mention of hospitality being a part of the new church in Acts. In fact, there is a passage that I think of often “And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts… ~Acts 2:46“ So many Christians close off their homes to others, citing one reason after another. Even though I have entertained many people in our home, an invitation in return to come to other people’s homes is still sparse. Is it an indication  of some who are uncomfortable to see our personal life and  living space – to not be able to “come as you are.”

When you come to my home, you will see my daughter’s toys around the fireplace in our living room. You will sometimes see a pile of freshly washed laundry being sorted. You will see my jewelry tools and beads scattered about on the kitchen island. It’s not perfect, but then neither am I. I see this as a sort of ministry (yes, to have a messy home – not dirty, but messy!). I have had women tell me that seeing my house as it is makes them want to invite someone over and not have that pressure to have it looking like a model home.

If we keep wearing masks, we miss out on endless opportunities. There is something freeing about “come as you are.” There is something authentic about people seeing your home with dishes in the sink. There is something genuine about reaching across the table and sharing a plate of cookies with a steaming cup of hot tea. The Bible teaches Christians to open their homes as a sacrificial way to love others. It is such a simple way  to promote UNITY in the Church and is a wonderful way to build relationships for Evangelism.

May we be like the early church share our home with others. May we have open hearts, open doors and open invitations to others. May we comfort others as God comforts us. Amen.

P.S. Yes, consider this as an open invitation to join me at my house for a cup of tea!