My iPhone calendar reminded me that Ramadan is again upon the 1.6 billion Muslims around the world. This is a time of reference and reflection for me. I am not only reminded of how Ramadan used to make me feel as a Muslim but the immense guilt it brought along with it… year after year.

Over the last 13 years, the Lord has reminded me of His great mercy and forgiveness. Muslims hope that Allah will be merciful to them. This is the beginning and ending request of each prayer made five times a day. “Bismillah al rahman al rahim”- to Allah the most gracious and merciful. But will Allah be merciful? There is no way for a Muslim to know.

You see, for me, Ramadan was a noise tightening around my neck. It was a reminder of how much I wanted to do the right thing but continued to mess up. How many times I would have to miss prayer time due to corporate meetings I could not miss. How many times I forgot and put food in my mouth, only to give up once and for all. Ramadan was a time of guilt.

When I was working, I asked a fellow Muslim how they were doing with everyone eating lunch all around them. He looked around cautiously and because he knew I wasn’t fasting, he smiled and said he had snacks in his pocket to have later when his devout friend wasn’t around. That’s not descriptive of all Muslims. There are some who are highly disciplined and don’t care about what others are doing. They will keep their fasts. I didn’t meet many of them but I know they’re around— they made sure to point it out to me.

so, the big question was what to do with my guilt? I was wrong. I knew I was wrong. All Muslims were supposed to fast. This Muslim was barely able to keep up with the daily prayers. I was failing miserably and there was no way out of the debt of bad deeds required to get to paradise.

This is where the words of the Gospel changed my life. Actually, they changed my death! I was headed for hell (according to Islam, mind you). I knew that the scales of Allah on judgment day would not balance out in my favor. When I heard the words of truth, the Gospel of my salvation, I knew that I was going to find the peace of God. I cannot explain it. It was like a two ton weight had been taken off and I knew that the things I was trying to do as a checklist meant nothing. They could not help me when I was standing in front of a Holy God.

my guilt was there because my mind and soul knew all my works were frivolous.But I had no remedy for the guilt. How would I ever reconcile my debt of bad deeds?

The answer was CHRIST.

It’s not what we do. It’s what He did on the cross- a sinless lamb who sacrificed Himself for the sins of those who belong to Him. Sinful people continue to sin. Only One who is sinless can allow us into the presence of God Almighty.

Guilt is a symptom of our bad deeds and sinfulness but only Christ is the remedy.

I thank my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for opening my eyes so I could see how tainted I was and how clean His blood could make me.

“Behold the lamb of God who takes away the sins of this world!” John 1:29