I was in such a good mood, humming a tune to myself when a truck wanted to be let in on the side of the road. I waited patiently, smiled and signaled with my hand to go ahead. The dude didn’t say anything, jammed out and then slammed his brakes in front of me, almost causing a wreck.
I don’t know what upset me more – his crazy driving or the fact that he did not follow proper driving etiquette. When someone motions you to go ahead, you should always give a little wave or even a smile or something to acknowledge the good deed you just did… right? I thought everyone knew that! Apparently, Mr. Driver of Chevy Silverado did not know anything about this nor did he care.As we drove along to the next traffic light, it occurred to me that good manners might be a thing of the past and that the word “THANK YOU” is also a relic that I am desperately hanging on to.
In a recent training workshop, I asked the group for non-monetary ways to motivate employees. Recognition came up towards the top, but many didn’t know how to recognize people without making a big production. My suggestion of a thank you note caused a reaction. My questions to the group were “When is the last time you got a thank you from someone?,” “When was the last time you got a hand written note from someone?,” “When was the last time you received a thank you note in the mailbox with a stamp on it?” The last question is the one that caused many to put their hands down.
Saying “THX” on a text might be a start, but it doesn’t do anything for someone. Spelling out “Thank you” on an e-mail is better, but it’s still informal. There is something about paper. There is something about seeing handwriting on a sheet of paper and being able to receive it the old fashioned way. I received a folded up sheet of paper with a hand written note from an employee at Campbell Soup once. He worked in the Tomato Operations plant and there was a small smudge on the top of the note with a piece of tomato on it. It wasn’t disgusting, but so very sweet! To take out the time to find a sheet of paper (hard to do out on the manufacturing floor), take a pen, jot down something thoughtful (one line of what he was thanking me for) and then to fold it up & leave it on your desk. Such an effort, that years later, I still appreciate it. Also, just so you know. I KEEP all my hand-written thank you’s. I am a romantic and love to recall affirmations. It’s sweet to go through and see how you may have impacted someone’s life or just made their day a bit brighter.
A couple things on creating a thankful culture: write a note immediately! I jot down a few things on the back of a receipt for the server, along with a nice tip for service. Keep a small notepad and pen handy in your car. I even have blank thank you cards with envelopes in my car for people.
If you are at work, try dropping off a hand-written card on a person’s desk but don’t discount the heartfelt thank you that is written on a paper napkin or a grocery sack. These are the things that help to make the day a bit better and seem more civil. Someone told me that the thank you notes and personal hand written notes have restored their sense of connection to coworkers. We are all in this together… so why not do something unexpected and out of the ordinary for someone?
By the way, if someone forgets to thank you, don’t worry too much about that also. It’s helpful to me to remember that we get our thanks in Heaven and should not expect it from mankind (Luke 6:35). It’s not easy to do, especially when you feel like you went out of your way to do something nice for someone, but unless we take the first step in acknowledging, appreciating and serving others – the culture will not change. In fact, it will get worse. This is why I really did I forgive that man who jumped in and then added insult to injury (that’s why I cropped out his license plate out of the picture! Ha ha!) and then I was prompted to think about what can I do to change some of these things that I see in business and in daily life. I hope that you will also take the time to pass on a small kindness to someone today.
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. ~ Ephesians 4:32